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A Guide to Settling Strategies for Babies

As parents embark on the rewarding yet challenging journey of raising a baby, one topic often surfaces as a major milestone: sleep training.


Establishing healthy sleep patterns is not only crucial for a baby's development but also contributes to a more harmonious household. Let’s explore a variety of settling strategies, ranging from traditional to gentle approaches, to help you find the method that best suits your parenting style and your baby's unique needs.


Keep in mind that this advice is general in nature and to really find the approach to best suit your baby and family, holistically, I recommend booking a consultation, here.


Understanding the Importance of Sleep Changes


Before diving into specific strategies, I must prefaceI hate the term Sleep Training, I prefer Sleep Guiding or Sleep Changes. Babies, like adults, benefit greatly from a consistent sleep routine. Quality sleep is essential for their physical growth, cognitive development, and emotional well-being. Sleep guiding aims to teach babies the skills to fall asleep independently and settle themselves back to sleep, fostering a healthier sleep pattern for both baby and parents. It is not recommended to do any form of official sleep training on babies younger than 4 months of age.


It is also important to understand the difference between Self-Settling and Self-Soothing. Self-settling is the act of falling asleep independently, whereas self-soothing is the ability to regulate one’s own emotions. Babies are cognitively and emotionally unable to self-soothe until they are over 6 months of age.



Newborn baby looking over mum's shoulder


Traditional Sleep Training Strategies


1. Cry-It-Out (CIO)

Advocates of this method suggest allowing babies to “self-soothe” by letting them cry for short intervals, gradually increasing the time before parental comfort is offered. This approach can be effective but may be emotionally challenging for parents.


2. Ferber Method (Controlled Crying)

Developed by Dr. Richard Ferber, this method involves progressively increasing the time between comforting visits to reassure the baby. It combines elements of self-soothing with intermittent parental support.


3. Chair Method/Gradual Withdrawal

Parents gradually move farther away from the cot each night until the baby can fall asleep independently. This method emphasises reducing parental presence over time. This can be done as fast or as slow as you and your baby need.


Some Gentle Sleep Training Strategies

*note this is not an exhaustive list.


1. No-Tears Method

Advocates of this approach, such as Dr. William Sears, emphasise responding promptly to a baby's cries, providing comfort and reassurance without leaving the baby to cry alone. It focuses on building a strong parent-child bond and attachment.


2. Pick-Up/Put-Down Method

Parents pick up the baby when they cry, calming them until calm but not fully asleep, then placing them back in the cot. This method repeats until the baby learns to settle independently.


3. Chair Method/Gradual Withdrawal Variation

Instead of gradually moving away, parents sit quietly by the cot and offer soothing words or gentle touch. Over time, they reduce their presence, allowing the baby to gain confidence in self-soothing.


Choosing the Right Approach


Now, for me, sleep training is not black and white. I like to operate in the grey. It is very rare that I will recommend one, solo strategy for parents but tailor hybrid strategies to suit their baby, their family and their needs. 


Selecting a sleep guiding strategy depends on your baby's temperament, your parenting philosophy, and your comfort level. It's crucial to be flexible and responsive, adjusting your approach as needed.


Remember, there's no one-size-fits-all solution, and the key is to be attuned to your baby's cues. The above strategies are a very simply version. Through 1:1 consultations I personalise settling strategies to suit the individual baby and family, no strategies are used in isolation. 


Whichever strategy you choose, consistency and patience are the cornerstones of successful sleep guiding. Every baby is unique, and finding the right balance between structure and flexibility will lead to a more peaceful and well-rested household. 


Sweet dreams await, and with the right settling strategy, both you and your baby can enjoy the gift of restful sleep. If you’d like to find the perfect solution for your baby and family, book your FREE Speedy Sleep Chat today and let’s get you on your way to sweet dreams. 


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